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Dear [[Name]],

Welcome to another edition of "BACKOFF" and a special welcome to those new subscribers joining us the first time. The list of "BACKOFF!" members continues to grow rapidly, as each month passes, and, I'm now busy sending out over one thousand issues to subscribers all over the world.
The feature article this month is one which is very close to my heart, that is the importance of motivation in all the things we do in life. I hope you can utilise some of this information in your of your own life.

Running a. small business as I do requires continual motivation, goal setting and assessment of how things are going. 'Of course not everything goes according to plan and some days are certainly better than others, but if you maintain your focus on the "big picture". the small ups and downs seem far lest impactual. As with all things in life the situation or circumstances is not what's important, what is important is how you think about or approach the situation. 

On another note my new book "How Dangerous Men Think" has sold over 10 000 copies and the positive response has been fantastic, I hope the all the subscribers who have read this book have enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Thanks for your support.

Take care, your friend

QUOTE OF THE MONTH

'Don't burn your bridges. You'll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river"
- Unknown

 



MOTIVATION TO SUCCEED

Without doubt, the key to success in all areas of our live determined by our ability to motivate ourselves to succeed. Whether it be sport, business, school or self protection, those that Win, Succeed or Reach the Top, all have one thing in common - their ongoing motivation to achieve their goals.

Motivation is closely linked our own self-image, how what we believe or we ourselves we are capable of. Remember, a "belief' is nothing more than what you repeatedly tell yourself over a long period of time. Through motivation we can destroy negative beliefs and create a more confident assertive self-image. Remember the lady I spoke of in the seminar who had a 100% belief that she could never defend herself in a confrontation, yet this same lady when motivated by the threat her little girl being abducted had absolutely no doubt in her ability to do whatever was required save her. Proof that the situation is not what's important, what important is your motivation to succeed in the situation.

Many people I talk to whilst conducting my seminars believe they don't have the ability to do certain things, when in reality they have more than enough ability they just haven't created sufficient motivation to tap into it. Unfortunately, a commonly held belief is. "you either have it, or you don't, and there's not much you can do about it" This type of attitude is what causes so many to lack self motivation. Remember, nothing will change until you do, don't wait for "ideal circumstances to suddenly appear - get motivated - go out and create them!

Often in my corporate seminars I talk about walking along a beam 20cm wide and 20 meters long and how everybody would do this for $100 if the beam were laid along the ground. But if we put the beam up higher and higher the motivation would have to increase to get people to walk across it. The more money offered the more people believe they can do it, proof again that a person's ability is more closely linked to their motivation to succeed than to the situation that confronts them.

I don't see success or ability in self-protection as any different to any other challenge in life. Obviously none of us would enjoy the prospect of being in a situation where we have to defend ourselves, but nevertheless we have to approach situations such as this with belief in our ability to succeed and greater motivation than the offender. If over ten years of researching and lecturing on self-protection has taught me anything it's that all of us have the ability to ultimately control most situations in our lives. What many people lack is not the ability, as I mentioned earlier, but the belief in their ability.

So where do we go from here'? Well if you are reading this information you're thinking that maybe there's some room for improvement in your motivation towards certain area of your life. You've probably just taken the biggest step, that is recognising the need for improvement! Many people spend their whole lives waiting for everything else to change before they do, the fact that you're even taking the time to read this article tells me your attitude is vastly superior to the majority of the population who never realise we each have to take responsibility for our own success. The next step is to realise that a slight change in your attitude, belief or motivation. can dramatically change the results you get in life. Start out small, focus on a situation or challenge that is holding you back, or you're not quite in control of, focus on the situation and how you can change your attitude toward it. Look at ways to increase your motivation to take control and create in your mind a belief that you now control the situation. It doesn't control you, (just like the lady defending her daughter).

Remember don't question your ability, you have the ability to do whatever you choose to do, don't accept the old excuse "I can't" that's nothing more than a meaningless words from the past. Don't react to situations, develop your belief in your ability to control them.



A BIG HAND FOR…..

Hello girls, I hope you found last month's article on Anorexia Neruosa informative. For this edition I would like to tell you a little about Bulimia.

Bulimia is a serious eating disorder which is thought to be more common than Anorexia and is often more difficult to recognise because the sufferer is usually of average or slightly above average weight for height.

Often Bulimia starts with rigid weight reduction dieting. Inadequate nutrition causes tiredness and powerful urges to binge eat. Vomiting after a binge seems to bring a sense of relief but this is temporary and soon turns to depression and guilt. Other people Use laxatives or fluid tablets, but these do not reduce fat content or kilojoules they severely dehydrate the body and deplete it of its essential electrolytes. 

The physical and emotional effects of eating disorders can be very serious, but are generally reversible if the illnesses is tackled in the early stages. Responding to early warning signs and obtaining early treatment is essential. 

For the next edition of "BACKOFF!" will look at metabolism, nutrition and exercise and how they relate to our body shape. If there are any issues you would like to know more about, please contact me at 'BACKOFF!
Until next month.



FACT Vs FIB

FIB- Girls can't physically resist assault be cause they are weaker than men.
FACT This belief is based on the assumption that you have to "overpower" your attacker to get away. Nearly all recognised styles of Martial Arts throughout the world focus on striking to your opponent's vulnerable areas- not matching his strength!
Self defence is 90% mental focus. 10% physical skill, your attacker need not be 'overpowered' for you to get away. If you have to, strike forcefully to a vulnerable area and run to safety.  The key here is to focus on your opponents weakness and exploit that weakness with a strategy.


Q&A FROM YOU THE CREW

Q. After attending your seminar and practicing the physical strikes, is there a danger of becoming overconfident?
A. In my experience, girls don't suffer from the same false overconfidence that guys do after learning one punch in some karate class then thinking they can take on, the world. . I never advise to "look" for a confrontation. my advice is, when ever possible avoid it, but if you are physically confronted I see no danger in you knowing how to get out of the situation.

Q. How can I maintain the right attitude?
A. Obviously I don't expect you to remember every single point covered in the course, but it's the philosophy or theme of the course which is important. Remember that more vital than the physical techniques is knowing that you have the choice t be assertive and if need be, fight back. The key to control over any situation is to remain focused and to trust in your ability.

Q. My boyfriend can pin me down or against wall, I can't overpower him, so how could I get away from an attacker?
A. A common mistake people make when discussing self defence is they believe you have to overpower your attacker. You don't! Far more effective is to strike a vulnerable area of the attacker, of course it's unlikely that you would do this to your boyfriend when you're mucking around, so don't compare your ability in a real life situation to what you're prepared to do to your boyfriend when there's no real danger to you.


KEEP IT UNDER YOUR HAT

A major study of over 400 women who successfully got away from rape confrontations found all women shared four common traits in the confrontation.

1 Early recognition of danger (= high awareness).
2 A mental determination to resist.
3 The ability to turn fear into anger.
4 An immediate and forceful response to the offender, (running when possible or verbal/physical confrontation).

A recent study of 150 sexual assault cases held in NSW Courts found 72% of the offences occurred in a private home and was most likely to be the home of the woman. The same study found that in 90% of the cases the offender was known by, the women he attacked.


JUST A THOUGHT

Last month I slipped a quick verse into this segment which spoke of the importance of thinking the right way to achieve success if life. The feedback I have received was so positive I thought I would continue the theme with this list of Winners Attributes from Nancy Sims.

WINNERS..... 

Take chances, like everyone else they fear failing, but they refuse to let fear control them. 

Don't give up, when things get tough they hang in until the going gets better. 

Are flexible, they realise there is more than one-way and are willing to try others. 

Know they are not perfect, they respect their weaknesses while making the most of their strengths. 

Fall, but they don't stay down, they stubbornly refuse to let a fall keep them from climbing.


DISCO DAN THE LADIES MAN

"Peer pressure can be one of the strongest influences in a young guys life. Unfortunately this peer pressure is not always a positive influence, young blokes are often motivated to behave in a certain way so as to live up to their mates expectations. Always be mindful of the influences of a guys mates when you're judging his trustworthiness".

"If you're starting to or, already are, going out and socialising at the weekends, help each other out by just keeping an eye on your girlfriends. Talk this through before you go out, maybe you can all agree if you arrive together you'll all leave together".

'Remember the "yes" strategy covered in the Date Rape section of the seminar. Reinforcement of this information will help ensure that you know what to do if you find yourself in an awkward situation".


FROM YOU THE CREW

Dear Brent, 

I just wanted to write to thank you for helping me out with the problem I was having with a particular person I compete against in my sport. As you know, I recently attended an International sporting event in Perth and was worried that, as I have in the past, I would mentally fall apart because I was competing against a girl who has had a very negative effect on my performance at State and National level for the past four years. Well, the good news is that the advice you gave me on thinking positively and motivating myself to succeed, really worked. I came home with 3 medals from the event. The turning point for me was when you said that performance was not being affected by the girl in question, but by my own attitude toward her. I 'had created a belief in my mind that I couldn't win when she was around. With your help I was able to totally change my, attitude towards the situation and turned it into a motivational tool, the results speak for themselves. Thanks again for your support and advice, it really made a difference.
P.H Sydney

Dear Brent, 

I'm a member of a very big group of people and normally we would go home together ... but the other night I had to go home alone because all of my friends wanted to stay but I had work early next morning. So I caught the train home and while on the train this guy came up to me and asked me if I wanted to .... you know ... have intercourse with him. There wasn't anyone else in the carriage but him and me. I told him that he's talking to the wrong girl and if he could please leave me alone but he had other ideas. He told me that I was just the girl and that I didn't need to be shy. He called me a whore and started to force me to kiss him. I tried to get up and off the seat but he grabbed me and held me down. I began to struggle and scream and try to hit him but he just held on. Then I remembered what you said about the date rape thing where you make them think you're submitting and IT WORKED!! He let me lose and I kicked him in the groin and ran down the train stairs and out into the station. I ran to the station ticket seller's window and told them what happened. The guy got away but now I know that I don't have to be afraid of anything like that happening again because if it does I just think back to our Self-Defence session and put those skills to use! You're course just saved me from being not only raped but also from thinking of myself as worthless and degraded for not doing anything to prevent it. Kind regards, a. Sydney, NSW.


PEARLY ONES FROM THOSE WHO'D KNOW

"Look for the circumstance you want and if you can't find it - create it!'
- Unknown

"Situations don't cause fear, but rather our belief that we don't have the ability to control the situation' - Brent Sanders

"Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it" - Lou Hotlz



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